Wednesday, Mar. 30, 2005
Hi, My Name is Summer and I'm TV Addict
I saw the most awesomest thing on TV last night. I was channel surfing and I stopped on what appeared to be a kid�s show. At first I was slightly disturbed, but then I was intrigued, and then I was entertained. I can�t even describe what the show was about. It was like a variety show, something like SNL�s Cartoon Funhouse on speed, crack, and acid all at the same time. Of course, I had to look it up on the TV Guide Channel to find out exactly what it was so that I could watch it again. It�s called �Wonder Sh0wzen� on MTV 2.
I got this from the show�s Website: �Wonder Sh0wzen is an absurdist comedy variety show, spiked with a team of puppets, kids, cartoons, and old educational films [somuchsugar, I added that last comma just for you, and because I feel the same way, too]. Wonder Sh0wzen takes your favorite things about watching TV as a kid and turns them into a twisted nightmare for all ages.� Lovely.
One segment featured a little red-headed boy who was a news anchor for the �Beat Children Network�. His assignment was to interview old men at the horse race track. He tells one old man that he can do an impression of him. The old man says that he�d like to see him try since he�s much older. The little boy says, �okay, watch this,� then he stares at the track and yells, �gamble, gamble, gamble, gamble�.die,� and slumps down into the chair. At first the old man doesn�t get it, but after a couple seconds, he looks at the kid and says, �yeah, it�s a tough habit to break.� I almost fell off of the bed. It was a lot funnier when I saw it on TV. I love sick and twisted humor.
On the topic of TV (since I don�t really have anything else to talk about), I saw another really cool show the other night on the Discovery Channel, I think. I don�t remember the name, but it�s about these two ex-thieves, and they show people who think that their houses are secure how easy it is for them to break in. They break in and trash the place and steal all the valuable items they can find in less than 5-minutes. Usually, the homeowners are all confident, and they watch everything from next door. They go from confident to pissed off in 2 minutes. One couple had these two huge dogs, and when the thief entered the house, they just ran up to him and played with him and didn�t bark at all. The wife was like, �those dogs are useless.�
After the one thief breaks in and trashes everything, the other thief takes the couple back to their home to look over the damage and to give them suggestions as to how to make their home safe. Then they have some time to do just that. Later, on an undisclosed date and time, the original thief tries to break in again, and if he fails, I think the couple wins something. I don�t really remember, but it was cool.
It made me think about my apartment and how nowhere is really safe. I feel somewhat safe in my place because there are bars on the windows and my door can�t be kicked in because it opens the other way. But, like I tell my mom all the time, if someone really wanted to break in, they�d find away.
More awesome TV stuff that I�ve seen in the past week:
-Tonya from the Real World/Road Rules Inferno throwing all of Beth�s clothes in the pool. Hee.
-A Dr. Scholl�s commercial that has the slogan �Victory against De-feet�.
-A really bad movie from the 80s named �Millennium�, starring Kris Kristofferson and Cheryl Ladd that started out about a mysterious plane crash, but then ended up being about time travel. I don�t know, I watched the entire thing but I was still confused at the end.
-Birth Stories on Animal Planet. There is nothing cuter than newborn kittens and puppies.
-Another bad movie, �Pregnant at 16�, this time from the lovely folks at Lifetime. This 16-year old girl falls in love with a college boy and they have sex and after the first time she gets pregnant. Her mom decides that the way to take care of this problem is to move to another city and tell everyone that the baby is actually hers and not the 16-year old�s. So then the girl pretends that she never, ever had a baby and leaves the mom to do everything for it while her and her sister hang at the mall. Then she decided that she wants to raise the baby and that she�s gonna tell the dad because he �loves her� and he�ll want to help her. Except, he rejects her and the baby, and asks that faithful question, �How do I know that it�s mine.� At the end, they end up giving the baby up for adoption to her health teacher and PE teacher, who are married but can�t have kids of their own. Why I sat through this crap, I don�t know.
Gawd, I need a life.
At least I�ve started going to the gym again.
summerroll at 12:17 p.m.